Celebrate this day by honoring the grandparent of your choice. Grandparents have played a significant role in shaping our personalities and character. Dr Oral Pavlov, our health and finance correspondent offers his touching reflection on his favorite grandparent.
When I think of Grandparents Day my mind takes me back to the sweet reveries of my childhood and the wonderful times I spent with my grandmum. I fondly remember my favorite book, The Protocols Of Elder, and Grandmum would read this epic every night when I was troubled with nightmares. I would awake crying out, “the Papists are coming” and she would enter my bed chamber in a flowing robe of red and olive green in a shear fiber that offered me a tantalizing yet forbidden glimpse into the feminine mystique that I still hold sacred to this day. After clearing my bed of comics, decapitated toy soldiers and various sexual devices she would then take me on an imaginary ride to the land of the Jew. Grandmum is gone, the victim of unspeakable deviances but her memory lives on in my character of this well adjusted American. Today I can proudly state that I hate Catholics, Muslims and Jews with equal fervor and I wish to thank this kind, loving woman for the compassion for the criminally insane that I hold today. Wishing you the best in your practice of proper mental hygiene. I remains, Dr Oral Pavlov, The Director