US POSTAL SERVICE AND DR PAVLOV TEAM UP TO FIGHT HOLIDAY DEPRESSION

Scan-002For most people the holidays are a joyous time of love,the satisfaction of giving,seeing old friends and most of all, a family celebration that forms a lifetime of treasured memories. Sadly, for others it can be a time of great stress, anxiety and depression .Mr. Miguel Mucilago, the USPS Inspector General, is aware of this problem and has remarked, “The holiday season is stressful for our understaffed  employees as they deal with the tremendous volume of mail that must meet impossible deadlines. This results in some of our supervisors some who are certified psychopaths or other employees who are “fed-up” with the situation to reach a breaking point and blow their brains out or commit unspeakable acts of mayhem. I have enlisted the help of Dr Oral Pavlov, the nation’s leader in the war on depression, for his assistance.and guidance to help our employees deal with the holiday rush. For his tireless devotion on the war on depression  we have  honored Dr Oral Pavlov, with a commemorative stamp to offer hope, understanding and the knowledge that there are many antidepressants that can turn was once a season of dread into the joyous times that others share”. Dr Pavlov explains; “At the Institute during this joyous season depression will not be tolerated and our residents enjoy the various festivities culminating  in the lighting of the Christmas tree decorated with ornaments crafted from pharmaceutical containers, catheters and other discarded items.My favorite is when our chorus, “The Unseen Voices” does a beautiful pantomime of “Silent Night”. We cordially invite you to celebrate the season with us and for every stamp sold the USPS has agreed to generously donate five cents to our nation’s leading pharmaceutical concerns to find a cure for this Holiday disease.”. Wishing you a happy Holiday and a reduction in postal violence and death by gunshot. Dr Oral Pavlov, The Director

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